THE FRIDAY CHUCKLER™ Donald Trump refuses to accept result of...

THE FRIDAY CHUCKLER™

Donald Trump refuses to accept result of Great British Bake Off



Donald Trump has shocked political pundits on both sides of the Atlantic by refusing to accept the result of the Great British Bake Off final.
The final was won last night by Candice Brown, but Mr Trump had been a supporter of Andrew Smythe ever since he saw his tropical holiday roulade.
“I can’t accept it. I’m sorry, but I just can’t,” said the micro-handed sociopath and Republican candidate.
“We know that the election system in our own great country is rigged. It is, it really is. We know this because I’ve repeated it on many occasions.
“So how do we know that the Great British Bake Off isn’t similarly rigged? After all, it’s run by the BBC, a well-known organisation of communists.
“I can’t think of any other reason. No other reason at all that Andrew Smythe didn’t win. I mean, did you see those clockwork pies?”
His opponent, Hilary Clinton declared herself shocked at Mr Trump’s comments.
“I, for one, am appalled that someone who is the nominee of one of the two major parties would take that position.
“Candice deserved the win for her marzipan peacock alone.”
Mr Trump has also hinted that he may refuse to accept the result of Strictly if Danny Mac doesn’t win.
“I will tell you at the time,” he said.
“I’ll keep you in suspense.”


Mexico Builds Wall First

By The Shovel on October 24, 2016

Mexico has erected a full-length border wall to keep out the millions of Americans hoping to flee from a potential Trump Presidency.
The wall, which stretches the entire length of the Mexico-US border, was built by a team of Mexican labourers who until recently had formed the backbone of the American agricultural industry. They’ve since pre-empted a Trump victory and returned home, causing the US agricultural industry to collapse.
A Mexican spokesperson said the country could not accommodate such an influx of illegal immigration, particularly from a country full of people crazy enough to vote for a pseudo-fascist reality TV host.
Yesterday thousands of Americans were trapped on the Californian and Texan borders, desperately looking for gaps in the wall. One man said he planned to hire a Mexican immigrant to build him a large ladder to enable him to scale the wall. He then remembered there were no Mexican immigrants available. He will start work on the ladder himself next month.


JK Rowling Releases New Book ‘Harry Potter And The Brand New Wing On My House’

The latest instalment in the Harry Potter series, released this week, addresses previously unanswered questions from the series such as, what is Harry’s son called, what house is he in at Hogwarts, and should I go with black or cream tiles in the fifth bathroom?
The book created a crush at stores around the world, and a beautiful new tennis court/swimming pool area in the author’s Scottish home.
Rowling said she had always wanted to build on the original character. “It’s that lovely mix of modern architecture within a classic 19^th Century home”.
It is the eighth story in the series and the third on Rowling’s home.