10. The government of Argentina announces they found the missing money and everything is back to normal as of tomorrow. Everyone will have a 10% bonus added to their account balances for the inconvience of the past few months. 9. Major paper producers announce that paper is rapidly appreciating in value and it is expected to be worth more than gold on a per ounce basis within the next few months. The soaring price of paper company shares takes stock markets to new all time highs. 8. The US trade deficit of $35 billion/month is going dissappear next month, with a significant surplus forcasted by year end. 7. Several large US corporations are going to have to restate their earnings because they inadvertently under reported their profits over the past few quarters. 6. As a result of 7 and 9 above the average P/E ratio of the S&P 500 is found to be 4:1 rather than 40:1. 5. A new movement among Corporate CEO's has them pledging to give up their salaries and stock options to work for free over the next five years. One CEO was quoted as saying "Our only concern is increasing shareholder value". 4. Japanese banks discover the problem was just a misplaced decimal point. It's just 2% of their loans that are bad, not 20%, so they aren't insolvent after all. 3. Statisticians discover that they had mislabelled some data columns, turns out the average American doesn't owe over $8000 on their credit cards they actually had over $8000 in their savings account. 2. Osama Bin Laden speaking for the al Qaeda organization says "It was all a big mistake and we are really really sorry." Arafat and Sharron make a surprise guest appearance at the news conference to say they had worked out all their differences. 1. Alchemists announce that after 600 years of work they have finally come up with the process to convert lead to gold. In response the Comex stated that this was no big deal, because they have been converting paper to gold and silver for years.
None of the above events has actually happened yet,(well except for the Comex creating gold and silver from paper) but when 3 or more of them do I plan to sell all my gold shares.
