so a guy by the name of Charles Darwin lit a firecracker and it went "bang"
this bang was so big, that it created rocks (out of nothing) and threw them across a distance of 20 Billion light years, and it only took 12 billion light years to reach that distance (lets just ignore that maths)
one rock decided to evolve into a sun and 10 rocks decided to evolve into planets,
one planet was getting lonely, so it decided to evolve life, before it could do this it had to as the sun to evolve some gravity to hold it in place, just far enough to keep it warm,
before it could do this it had to evolve some primordial slime for life to begin in (how a barren rock could evolve some primordial slim is anyones guess)
when the rock had evloved the slime, then it could create it's own single cell organism.
when the single cell organism got bored, it decided to evolve into more complex organisms to start with, (although why after starting out as a single cell, it decided to evolve into something that required a mate to reproduce is anyones guess)
after living in the slime for a while, it decided to evolve into something that could walk on land, hoping that trees and plants had also decided to evolve or it would starve to death)
miraculuously, plants also decided to evolve, and they thought to themselves, the only way we could reproduce, is if we decide to evolve a seed, then evolve a fruit around that seed, hoping that something came out of the slime to eat the fruit or they would not be able to reproduce.
