the big c is about to take my mate of 13 yrs

and I am in unchartered waters. I don't know what to do.

Those with good memories might remember me asking a year ago if any one had given their dog chemo. No reply convinced me to go against my gut feeling to let nature take it's course.

She has been comfortable for this time so I think we made the right decision. With a year's warning we thought we were prepared for the eventual physical failure but what we are seeing is nothing like what we expected. She is weaker of course and prefers us to carry her up stairs or to lift her onto chairs, but she isn't bad or in pain. But I'm convinced the cancer is destroying her brain.

I think she is mentally incontinent, not physically. She doesn't see or hear much but I don't think her eyes or ears are that bad. We took her to the vet today and brought her home again but face the imminent prospect of having to put down a dog still in fair physical condition.

don't know why I'm telling you this because there is nothing you can do or say to help but I want to tell the story I guess.