actuary, the point I was trying to make, is that most societies have events in their past that are regrettable. However not all allow themselves to let such events stop them from moving on, especially when it is words only that they want to hear. To make yourself dependant on the words of someone else is acknowledging firstly that you are allowing them to control your actions, or more precisely, they act, you react; and secondly you confirm their authority over yourself by acknowledging the importance to you of their mere words. I sometimes wonder at times whether some people who have put their lives on hold to pursue "justice" through the legal system would not have done better for themselves by focusing on their future rather than their past, especially if there was no real benefits to be had other than satisfaction.