actuary, I have no doubt that words may have great significance for some people and bring peace of mind, but I cannot help but wonder if the lack of such words were preventing them from putting the past behind, were they the real impediment, and will things change suddenly. Look at it from the point of view of a marriage. Whilst saying sorry at times can quickly smooth over a problem, if something occurs that results in the relationship, in the opinion of one party, not able to progress until the other party apologises, then I think that marriage is doomed, even if an apology is eventually made. It really comes down to whether they are able to see the glass as half empty or as half full. A spouse who is able to forgive and forget, in the absence of an apology, is, imo, a bigger person for it, and obviously one that realises that nuturing the positive aspects of the relationship yields more dividends than dwelling on the negative aspects. I believe human beings are the most adaptable creatures alive, able to adapt to any situation that their mind allows them to. Yet I imagine that most marriages fail because some negative aspect of the relationship becomes the driving force rather than the positive aspects.
