External News & Commentary, page-2070

The plight of the rare Nevada dancing beetle.

Nevada dancing beetle, very rare, only exists in a symbiotic relationship with a weed known as Tiehm's buckwheat, and definitely needs to be put on the endangered list, could be subject to a high court ruling that orders an investigation by world renowned environmentalists (aka anti-mining extremists) that will take at least 2 years to complete. When the beetle dances it gives off a rare light spray (beetle piss) which needs to be investigated by medical researchers as a cure for Cancer. The beetle may be crucial to the future of humanity, and only lives on the site of a proposed Lithium mine by Ioneer. Urgent action needs to be taken now, by hippies dancing in a circle, chanting, and playing their tambourines, in order to keep the beetle producing a spray on to Tiehms, which also gives the weed it's rare colour. Humanity be warned, a mine being built on the home of the Nevada dancing beetle literally threatens the existence of the human species on this planet. And we all know there will be a bleeding-heart judge somewhere in the USA who will believe this crap.




Gw