Ann: Trading Halt, page-20

Leaked deal memo:

LPD is thrilled to announce the signing of a strategic finance agreement with FlashCash Express, a leading provider of short-term liquidity solutions. This agreement provides the company with the necessary capital to navigate its next chapter of growth and innovation, albeit at a competitive interest rate of 432% per annum (compounded hourly).This groundbreaking partnership reaffirms the Board’s commitment to bold decision-making in the face of adversity. By leveraging FlashCash Express’s unique funding solutions, LPD has ensured immediate liquidity, demonstrating resilience in today’s challenging economic landscape.

“This deal marks a pivotal moment for LPD”. “While some may call the terms ‘predatory,’ we see them as 'pioneering'—a beacon of creativity in financial restructuring.”In light of this achievement, the Board of Directors is pleased to announce its intention to propose a 30% increase in management remuneration at the upcoming Annual General Meeting. This is to recognize the tireless efforts and innovative thinking that led to this transformative financial milestone.

The company assures stakeholders that every dollar of the FlashCash facility will be used prudently—primarily to cover existing debts, fund team-building retreats, and purchase premium coffee for the executive lounge. LPD remains committed to transparency and will continue to keep shareholders updated as we progress through this exciting period of evolution.

This is not real, its just a joke, please dont sue me LPD... ^{you got no money anyway..}