johnaus - garden variety correction wednesday, page-31

Dear Valued B class clientr,

We notice that your use of the big red "Panic Now" button has become increasingly sporadic. We can't stress enough how important it is for you to make full use of the "Panic Now" button in the light of current market weakness. Are we not partners in life? It is our job to keep you fully informed of all the negative news and negative sentiment worldwide and all you have to do is keep hitting that red button. See - partner? This also helps your uncle Fred, our A class client, to complete the testing of the big Green "BUY EVERYTHING NOW" button so that we can install it on your system once he has finished with it. So keep hitting that red sucker because you just don't know what new disaster we are going to keep you informed of tomorrow.
We can promise you things will improve once we have installed the new improved "BUY" button on your system - we will make sure you are kept well informed of all the good news as soon as it comes out so you can fully appreciate the value of the "BUY" button

Yours most sincerely
CFD provider
Member of the S.M. group of companies.