For those of you who won’t be able to attend, I thought that you might like to know when significant events were going to occur so that you might stay in step.
Labor National Convention Schedule
4:00 PM – Opening: Oz Flag Burning Ceremony 4:05 PM – Singing of "The Internationale " led by Craig Emerson 4:10 PM – Pledge of Allegiance to Julia
4:15 PM – Ceremonial 'Why I hate Australia' led by Guest Speaker Bob Brown (with chorus chanted by GetUp! 4:30 PM – Tips on Magic Pudding Economics – Wayne Swan 4:45 PM – Imam of Lakemba Mosque Leads Queen of Spades Choir in Singing "Off with the Infidels Heads"
5:00 PM – UFO Abduction Survival – Tim Whatsisname 5:30 PM – Julia Speaks on "Marriage, Children & Family Values" (with guest appearance by Penny Wong) 5:45 PM – Koranic Prayer lead by the Imam of the Lakemba Mosque
6:00 PM – Minister for Immigration grants all illegals citizenship and free Labor Party membership 8:30 PM – Comedy skit on the plight of Military Pensioners by the Minister for Veterans Affairs 9:00 PM – Greg Combet speech on “How Oz saved the world from Global Warming”
9:15 PM – Tribute Film to the Freedom Fighters in Afghanistan – Guest Speaker Adam Bandt (Greens) 9:45 PM – Personal Finance Seminar – Craig Thompson (with slides {Note attendees must be over 21}) 10:00 PM – Denunciation of AbbotAbbottAbbott – Mark Dreyfus, Parliamentary Secretary
10:30 PM – Declaration of the White Flag – Open Session on how we lost the wars in Iraq & Afghanistan 11:00 PM – Green Energy Plan Symposium by candlelight 11:15 PM – Free David Hicks Campaign fundraiser – Proceeds to the Peter Slipper Fighting Fund
11:30 PM – Slippery morals, lack of ethics and why we need to increase MP’s Pay - (Guest Independent) 11:45 PM – Feeding the Indonesians with 5 Loaves and 2 Fish – Now that our cattle industry is dead – Joe Ludwig 12:00 AM – Rendition of “The Pink Batts are Burning” – Peter Garrett & Midnight Oil
12:01 AM – Why Kevin deserves a UN Security Council Seat and a cost of $10Bn – Kevin Rudd 12:05 AM – Heavens to open and Julia anointed as the “Dear Leader” 3:00 AM – Christine Milne Delivers Julia’s Acceptance Speech and announces the location of the first Gulag
