If it is a scam then the sad thing is it's probably too late. I wouldn't know about the internet dating sites as my missus won't let me join one, but most ghosting programs are sent to your computer from the host via e-mail. As soon as you open the e-mail from her (more likely a him) a program that records your key strokes has begun.
I would highly suggest you stop any internet banking, any finical activities ie share trading etc and personal activities from your computer until you have your computers operational system checked by a IT professional.