postcard from china

Hi fellas,

I write from deep in the heart of China. I don't have much time as I am being chased. Just a quick update, I think the Chinese President has listened and will stay quiet on all economic matters relating to expansion. I thank Cougzen for his needle and thread. As part of my promoting of AGM I have been handing out Maps of Tasmania to any Chinese person I meet. Unfortunately my "maps of Tassie" references have led to some delightful misunderstandings with some of the lovely young Chinese ladies hence I have several irate fathers after me. My "ban the chopstick" campaign starts in earnest tomorrow. I reckon a billion stainless steel knives,forks and spoons might "Posideonise" AGM. I am off to India on Wednesday night as I have heard some worrying reports that the Ganges is being used to wash dishes rather than stainless steel kitchen sinks. I will report on my findings but I may be suggesting a dam up in the Himalayas to completely block the Ganges and force all cleaning back to the kitchen. Anyway I better go my friends as I hear sounds frighteningly similar to an original castration implement in the distance. I'll report from Mumbai soon. Hope you all have a good week