With a little bit of a polish, you really would receive a resounding reception the next comedy festival in Melbourne.
Honestly, as i read you words, i see an international standard of dry tongue in cheek humour that could make you rich and have audiences abslutely writhing in laughter, tears flowing and bellies aching.
I am not being facetious as i think you know that you are playing the devils ill informed advocate and that i honestly think you are entertaining yourself. I am finally taking it on for what i think it is and I am enjoying it very much.
Seriously, try out a few of your statements at the next party you attend and you will see why i am entertained, but i think you already know your level extremity is for your own light comic relief in an otherwise serious forum thread.