i thought about the issue plus discussed it with an intelligent friend
i came to the personal conclusion that the lost money goes to two places:
(1) into the pockets of speculators, who are not prepared to invest it into real economic job creating activity
(2) it is dissipated amongst many who profit in a small way, thus not large enough to be used as real economic job creating capital
for example, when a real estate development goes bust, money has been paid to suppliers, workers, company directors, etc, but each gainer is so small that the aggregate amount of "lost" capital cannot be used or re-lent for real economic activity