Angry old white Australian male and proud of it!, page-44

It’s a pleasure to see some old white men responding to the angry justification. Apart from the silliness of justifying anger it’s an appalling waste of energy. I once did an exercise with a group of miners who had the view that being angry gave them
more energy and strength than being at peace or happy. They found the opposite. For some reason that was a revelation to them.

I work with with a group of decent men, many of whom are old and some of whom could be classified as grumpy (but aren’t) who are decent hard working folk who day in and day out deal with men who are angry. Not only angry but feel justified in expressing that anger, which for the large part finds its target in other people. There’s a price to pay for that as well usually. In unhappy relationships, and stress. It actually takes a real man to understand that impulse control is what makes the difference.

there is one common pattern. It’s always someone else’s fault. Someone else is to blame for every misery in life. Every disappointment. Every gap between what they want and what they have. Someone else has it better. Someone else doesn’t understand. Someone else makes them feel angry. Someone else makes them lash out.

the first step in the work these men do is to help build some insight into how taking responsibility makes a difference. I feel privileged to work with them. These men are exceptionally skilled and committed to the work they do. Many have seen or experienced the price of anger.

I also agree with the posters who have highlighted that often fear sits behind some of these issues. Fear of failure. Fear of being no one. Fear of change. Fear of not having control. Fear that the other person might not respect them. Fear of whatever. Fear and anger are parasitic conditions that eat the person alive.

I wonder how many many of the grumpy/angry old men rebelled against their parents or thought that what they were doing made more sense, was more liberating or smarter than their parents. I wonder how many of you took advantage of any of the benefits available from the government as you went through life. I wonder how many of you are aware that it is actually the baby boomer generation and the one following quickly afterwards who have taken advantage of the economic system that has left our younger people facing the necessity to prop us up in our old age through health care, aged care, pensions or other support services. We haven’t actually done the world a lot of favours and insisting on our right to be angry because it suits us is an insult to the generations we created.

Mind you it’s an easy choice if you asked me whether I’d prefer to talk to someone who openly admits they fit into the category of angry white man rather than a person who has adopted the persona of being enlightened, liberal, against ill treatment of children, against violence, anti racist and so on where the reality is the opposite and their posts on HC among other things are a clear indication. I can cope with honesty but hypocrisy is unpleasant to be around. I know. I’ve experienced it.

P