''Hopefully you run into Swiftycrook and Missthemaths at the...

''Hopefully you run into Swiftycrook and Missthemaths at the local and can take your frustrations out.
Unfortunately they have your money and probably at a better pub''

That is one of the cruelest , funniest lines I can remember , I will look for opportunities to use variations of it in the future.
As per my usual practice , there will be no attribution and I will pretend I thought it up myself.

I do think you are being a little optimistic as far as the banks are concerned.