more blonde jokes

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    FIRST DEGREE
    A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2in the morning.
    The wife (undoubtedly blonde), picked up the phone, listened a moment and
    said, "How should I know, that's 200 miles from here!" and hung up.
    The husband said, "Who was that?"
    The wife said, "I don't know, some woman wanting to know if the coast is
    clear."

    SECOND DEGREE
    Two blondes are walking down the street.
    One notices a compact on the sidewalk and leans down to pick it up.
    She opens it, looks in the mirror and says, "Hmm, this person looks
    familiar."
    The second blonde says, "Here, let me see!"
    So the first blonde hands her the compact.
    The second one looks in the mirror and says, "You dummy, it's me!"

    THIRD DEGREE
    A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and
    buys a gun.
    She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door
    she finds him in the arms of a redhead.
    Well, the blonde is really angry
    She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, she is
    overcome with grief.
    She takes the gun and puts it to her head.
    The boyfriend yells, "No, honey, don't do it!!!"
    The blonde replies, "Shut up, you're next!"

    FOURTH DEGREE
    A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals.
    She proudly says, "Go ahead, ask me, I know all! of them."
    A friend says, "OK, what'! s the ca pital of Wisconsin?"
    The blonde replies, "Oh, that's easy: W."

    FIFTH DEGREE
    What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was pregnant?
    "Is it mine?"

    SIXTH DEGREE
    Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA freshman, sat in her US
    government class.
    The professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs.Wade was about.
    Bambi pondered the question then finally said, "That was the decision
    George Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware."

    SEVENTH DEGREE
    Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked
    and burglarized.
    She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime.
    The po! lice dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit,
    patrolling nearby was the first to respond.
    As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde
    ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog,
    then sat down on the steps.
    Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, "I come home to find all my
    possessions stolen.
    I call the police for help, and what do they do?
    They send me a BLIND policeman
 
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