that’s true. Though in one case they did work to start with then stopped. The other I discovered afterwards what the facts were. But I accept that i effectively made a choice. The second however was a complex psychological story that doesn’t need explaining here. But not as simple as making a choice. Fear and having your head messed with results in behaviour that looks odd.
I think unless you’ve been through it you can never quite understand and even when you have it’s hard to understand. The only way to peace is to learn the lessons, get on with having a good life and forgive oneself
