I can’t believe this argument is still going?! There are no...

I can’t believe this argument is still going?! There are no Bulls in the city!

As I’m sure you all know, most of the 4WD drivers in the city fit into 3 categories.

The first are the ex-Volvo drivers (Volvo is dying in Australia). These are drivers who are so bad that they need a “safe” car to protect themselves. The Bull bar should be called a “Shopping trolley” bar, as these are generally used when the driver hits shopping trolleys, parking station walls, letter boxes etc.

The second are the soccer mums. They are also insecure in their driving ability but feel more powerful when in a 4WD. A 4WD help them with real driver tests like speed humps. Recently I was at a primary school at the end of the day and saw every Mum had a 4WD. Unfortunately, the kids were short and many of the Mums could see them as the front of the car was so high. Therefore these bull bars should be called “Kid” bars, as they will kill many more children then bulls.

The third common type of city 4WD driver is the “rugged” guy. He’s 30 something or 40 something, and the Big 4WD is the new mid-life crisis choice of car. He gets a sense of power from the vehicle. It gives him a sense of presence that he wouldn’t normally have and goes a part of the way to compensating for the many insecurities in his life. This Bull bar should be called the “extension”, as a big strong bull bar in his big strong car is like the pen1s extension he obviously needs.

Even the vehicle company execs are appalled by the people who buy their cars. The current No. 1 reason for people buying a 4WD is that “they like the height it gives them. They can see further”. I personally like them, because it is so easy to cut them off, as they have no guts. Even if the driver tries to sit on your tail afterwards, you can drag off a 4WD in a Datsun 180B, so no one really cares. Are they unsightly and a traffic obstruction? Yes, but now you know the real names for the “Bull” bars, I sure you can laugh at or ridicule the drivers like the rest of us.

Cheers