WASHINGTON, D. C. - To combat the ongoing threat of coronavirus, the Center for Disease Control has urged citizens to no longer greet each other with handshakes or hugs, but to use exclusively jazz hands in hopes of preventing the disease from spreading further, the organization confirmed this morning.
“We urge everyone to stop shaking hands immediately,” said Dr. Ruben Spurkle, a spokesperson for the CDC. “Instead, we suggest greeting people in a manner both more sanitary and, frankly, more fabulous: jazz hands. If we have any hope of saving the world from this crippling disease, by God, it is with sassy, interpretive movement.”
