A cow was recently given the badge of bravery.
Her actions proved she was no cow-ard.
What is the definition of bravery?
A man with diarrhea chancing a fart!
A comedian was on vacation in London.
A comedian was on a vacation in London when he came across a large crowd. He pushed and squeezed his way past the ocean of people and saw the Royal Family who were on their way to have lunch. As he takes out his phone to snap a photo, he saw from the corner of his eye a shady man pushing past the crowd. The comedian, having a gut feeling of a bad omen, walked towards the stranger who pushed past the security and ran straight to the Queen. With his quick reflexes, the comedian jumped and tackled the attacker, knocking him down and subduing him long enough for the guards to seize him.
The Royal Family, grateful for the comedian's heroicism, thanked the comedian while the crowd applauded. The Queen, not wanting his effort go to waste, offered anything in return. The comedian denied her gifts and rewards, but the Queen was persistent. In her last effort, she offered him a dinner at the very least in the royal palace itself. The comedian mulled it over, and as he had no plans for the night anyway, accepted her offer.
He was not able to wear anything half decent to the dinner. The guards mistook him for a beggar at first before the prince came by to grant him entry. When they entered the main hall, he was mesmerised by the extravagant display. Rare antique paintings line the walls, while a huge glistering crystal chandelier hung above them. It reflected every colour of the spectrum, casting rainbows everywhere. The prince led him to the dining hall where the dinner will take place.
Right as they enter the dining hall, a group of high-ranking officials paraded the comedian with applause, something he could never say about his comedy career. He was escorted by a butler towards his seat, right across the crown prince and heir to the throne.
The Queen began the dinner with a greeting to all. She acknowledged the presence of their saviour from earlier, this simple comedian, for his act of courage which saved them all. She went on about the duties of a knight, likening them to the bravery of this comedian.
As he was getting bored by the Queen's long message, his eyes wandered off to scan the dinner table. An elegant, skillfully woven piece of tapestry lay atop the expensive ebony table. The plates were of the highest quality, luxurious enough to make the lamest meals look like gourmet. The cutlery were shining, absolute fine silverware and crafted to perfection. His eyes met the prince's plate, which was peculiarly out of place. It was but a cheap paper plate, the ones that can be bought in bulk for spare change. He was using disposable utensils, made of plastic that looks like it would snap the moment the prince applied force on it. Likewise, the princess was using the same cheap dinnerware, and seemed to be perfectly fine with it while the rest of the esteemed guests used the most expensive ones.
The royal chefs enter the room carrying on their silver platters their meals for the night. It was the most exquisite steak the comedian has ever seen, smeared with sauce infused with herbs and spices from God knows where- this was their dinner. Behind the head chef was a line of assistants carrying individual side dishes to the guests and royal family. Their glasses were filled with expensive wine, emitting a strong scent.
Meanwhile, a pair of lower-ranking cooks assisted the prince and princess with their food. They were having basic, poorly made spaghetti. The cooks sloppily scoop the sauce on top of their noodles, making a mess while they did.
The Queen offered a toast to begin the dinner. The chattering of the guest died down as they began to enjoy their meals. The comedian is still bothered by the two heirs, who are eating such simple meals while no one bats an eye. While the others ate, he silently stared at the prince and princess eat their meals.
The comedian leaned over to the Queen and asked, "So what's the deal with the heir line food?"
