GRANDAD IS WORSER```What supplement is good for...

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    GRANDAD IS WORSER
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    What supplement is good for wrinkles?

    Iron.
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    Dog walks into a telegraph office...

    Says he wants to send a message.

    "Sure" says the clerk, "what's the message?"

    "Woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof."

    Clerk says, "OK, but for the same price, there's enough room for one more 'woof'".

    Dog wrinkles his brow and replies, "But that wouldn't make any sense.."



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    The barbershop finally opened again in the Netherlands!

    While i was being cut an old man came in.

    "Listen", he said. "I need someone to trim my sideburns. I can't do it myself anymore because i got so many wrinkles and shaky hands."

    "No problem", said the barber. "You're not the first one with this problem old friend, just keep this small wooden ball in your mouth and press it against your cheek while i trim your sideburns there."

    So the man takes the wooden ball in his mouth and follows the barber's directions.

    "Well i'll be damned! This is the cleanest shave i've had in years", cries the old man.

    "i've got to ask though", said the old man. "What would've happened if i accidentally swallowed the ball?".
    "Oh not a problem", said the barber. "It happens quiete often. People just return the ball the next day".

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    Hey, Terry

    A woman walks into the Ipswich Centrelink office, trailed by 15 kids...

    "WOW," the social worker exclaims, "Are they ALL yours?

    "Yeah they are all mine," the flustered mother sighs, having heard that

    question a thousand times before.

    She says, "Sit down Terry." All the children rush to find seats.

    "Well," says the social worker, "then you must be here to sign up. I'll

    need all your children's names."

    "This one's my oldest - he is Terry."

    "OK, and who's next?"

    "Well, this one he is Terry, also."

    The social worker raises an eyebrow but continues. One by one, through the

    oldest four, all boys, all named Terry.

    Then she is introduced to the eldest girl, named Terri.

    "All right," says the caseworker. "I'm seeing a pattern here. Are they ALL

    named Terri?"

    Their Mother replied, "Well, yes-it makes it easier. When it is time to get

    them out of bed and ready for school, I yell, 'Terry!' An' when it's time

    for dinner, I just yell 'Terry!' an' they all come runnin.'

    An' if I need to stop the kid who's running into the street, I just yell

    "Terry" and all of them stop. It's the smartest idea I ever had, namin'

    them all Terry."

    The social worker thinks this over for a bit, then wrinkles her forehead

    and says tentatively, "But what if you just want ONE kid to come, and not

    the whole bunch?"

    "I call them by their last names!"

    `

    A blonde in her early 50's hears that bathing in milk once a week will tone skin, and remove wrinkles...

    She decides to try this wrinkle remedy, so she leaves a sign on her front door for the Milkman to leave her 27 gallons of milk.

    The Milkman comes along and sees her sign. He thinks that she must have made a mistake, as 27 gallons is a substantial amount of milk, so he knocks on her door and she answers.

    "Excuse me miss, but I had to be certain that you meant 27 gallons of milk and not 2.7 gallons. It just seems like a bit much."

    She tells him; "No, 27 gallons is correct. I heard that milk is a great remedy to remove wrinkles, so I want 27 gallons of it so I can fill up my tub and bath in it."

    The Milkman thinks about this for a second, but doesn't argue the fact and says: "Well ok, I can do that. Do you want the milk pasteurized?"

    The Blonde says: "No, just up to my tits, I'll splash it on my face."



    ADDON
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