You have 2 cows. You give one to your neighbor. COMMUNISM You...

You have 2 cows.

You give one to your neighbor.

COMMUNISM



You have 2 cows.

The State takes both and gives you some milk.

FASCISM



You have 2 cows.

The State takes both and sells you some milk.

NAZISM


You have 2 cows.

The State takes both and shoots you.

BUREAUCRATISM


You have 2 cows.

The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and throws the milk away...

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM


You have two cows.

You sell one and buy a bull.

Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.

You sell them and retire on the income.

SURREALISM


You have two cows.

You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.

Later, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow has dropped dead.


VENTURE CAPITALISM


You have two cows.

You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four
cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows.

The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company.

The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more.

You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows.

No balance sheet provided with the release.



The public then buys your bull.


CONSORT