"Why would the dead have any reason to be concerned about assumptions made of them?"
So you think you're dead now? Awesome. I've spent all this time speaking with an insane person.
"I didn't get a private Christian education."
I didn't either. But you're writing style has nothing to do with your education. It has to do with you wanting to sound all cryptic and enlightened. I see conspiracy theorists using a similar style. It makes them feel special and unique. But really just makes them look like idiots.
"People who know me know how I say science is really good by people who devote their lives to making our lives better."
A lot of religious people like science when it suits them. But will then ignore it when it creates conflict with their beliefs. Science doesn't care what you believe. It will show you the reality regardless of what you were hoping to see.
