(a John Clarke, Bryan Dawes skit)
(The Customer)
[Scene: A car yard. BRYAN is perusing the stock. He is approached by JOHN]
John: Morning! Looking for a new car?
Bryan: Nope. Prime Minister, actually.
John: You?re the third one this morning. Anything in mind?
Bryan: You know....... nothing fancy, reliable, economical family model. Something to get the country from A to B.
John: You mean like a Howard?
Bryan: Yeah....a little Johnny. Nothing flash, does the job. Low maintenance, economical, sensible. Runs for years, no troubles.
John: So.... you used to have one?
Bryan: Yeah. About 10 years. Great little model ? don?t know why I got rid of him --biggest mistake I?ve ever made?
John: What happened?
Bryan: Traded him in for a Kevin 07.
John: Big mistake?
Bryan: Lot of people bought it. Good political mileage.
John: How was the Kevin 07?
Bryan: Came with a $900 factory rebate ? that was good.
John: Anything else?
Bryan: Not much. Sounded nice but nothing under the bonnet. It was a lemon.
John: Didn?t stick around for long did it?
Bryan: Nah ? had a factory recall. Shipped overseas and was never seen again.
John: What was the problem?
Bryan: Lots. But the final straw was the navigation system. Plug it in and it automatically loses its own way.
John: Whatcha got now?
Bryan: It?s a Gillard-Brown.
John: The hybrid?
Bryan: Yeah. The Eco-drive system ? not a good idea. An engine that can?t deliver hooked up to a transmission stuck in permanent reverse?
John: Green paintwork with a red interior. And steering that always lurches to the left for no apparent reason ? that?s the one?
Bryan: The Fustercluck model.
John: The only one they made, Bryan. Not the vehicle of choice for the road to recovery ? but did they finish up fixing the navigation system?
Bryan: Made it worse. Turn it on and it does a press release, heads off in all directions and goes nowhere.
John: So that?s why you?re here?
Bryan: That?s right. I?m stuck with a government that's wasteful, expensive, ineffective and past its use by date. I don?t suppose you?ve heard of the ?Cash for Clunkers? scheme?
John: Join the queue brother.
- Forums
- Political Debate
- daws and clarke have nailed it !
(a John Clarke, Bryan Dawes skit) (The Customer) [Scene: A car...
-
- There are more pages in this discussion • 4 more messages in this thread...
You’re viewing a single post only. To view the entire thread just sign in or Join Now (FREE)