to be taken in the spirit it is written :)----Duck Taxis to...

to be taken in the spirit it is written :)

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Duck Taxis to takeover BHP

Inspired by the actions of their counterparts in Hong Kong, Duck Taxis, a small Perth based taxi firm has launched an audacious bid to take over BHP and then RIO.

Seeing obvious synergies, Duck Taxi President Bob Sham said "It is clear from the Wah Nam experience that it is quite possible to make the transition and after decades of picking up drunkards on Perth's streets our Board decided that now was the time to make the move. One of our Board members had a Prospecting License once, so we have the experience necessary to add real value."

Duck Taxis will be offering 30,000 shares in its Taxi business for each BHP share until they take a controlling stake after which they intend to offer 90,000 shares for each RIO share.

When asked whether their actions might draw attention from the Takeover's Board Bob replied "We've got that covered. We've put a member of the Takeover's Board on our legal team and in a word it'll all be "sweet"."

The transition of taxi drivers into mining powerhouses is the start of a global trend that Bob sees no end to. "We've been in touch with our Indian taxi colleagues and Thai Tuk Tuk brothers who also intend to make a similar transition. The years of us being treated as second grade citizens are over and ask all my taxi brothers and sisters to rise up and take what is rightfully theirs."

Asked whether it was his intention to sack the BHP Board should they succeed Bob replied "Not at all." "Our actions might look hostile in the eyes of some, but we see this as a friendly acquisition. We aren't the enemy here, we are friends and I expect the new Board to become a dream team of Duck Taxis and BHP Board members."

Asked why so many apparently independent shareholders from overseas countries were buying BHP shares and quickly converting them to Duck Taxis shares Bob said "They can see the obvious value in having a taxi firm calling the shots. For Years these mining companies had the blinkers on when choosing their Board members and it is clear many investors have had an instant epiphany - the world belongs to us and we intend to take it".

Neither ASIC or the Takeovers Panel would comment, other than to say that they have found nothing that warrents further investigation.