The farmer and his dog then went to the pub for a post-work...

The farmer and his dog then went to the pub for a post-work drink but the farmer realised he'd left his wallet in his ute.

So rather than walk back he says to the barman, "If I get my dog to talk will, you give me a free beer?"

"Willingly," says the barman, a half-smile on his face.

So the farmer turns to the dog and says: "What's the opposite of smooth?"

"Ruff" says the dog.

"That's BS," says the barman. "try again."

So the farmer asks the dog: "What do you call that thing on top of a house?"

"Roof," says the dog.

"More BS," says the barman. "I'll give you one more try."

"What's one quarter plus one quarter?" the farmer asks the dog.

"Arf," says the dog.

"Out," says the barman, and ejects the farmer and the dog.

While they're walking back to the ute, the dog looks at the farmer and says "Which one did I get wrong?"