@wotsup - I totally agree with you - I too, had to grapple my...

@wotsup - I totally agree with you - I too, had to grapple my way to some sort of comfort, having lost my husband just at that moment when he was beginning to earn good money - but having rebuilt 3 houses - - - and having been a good 'migrant' in many interesting and important jobs.

I did own a large home when he passed, though, but we I couldn't do much more for my remaining 2 daughters, 3 in total, but one had already made her life in England and it was a good and profitable one - she is the one who passed away 3 years ago.
I am proud of having made it in a new country, having adapted (I sometimes meet up with fellow countrymen/women who are still moaning about the land of their birth) getting to know and to love a new culture, feeling genuinely at home here, having had many interesting jobs, met interesting people . . .
but you cannot 'set up' your children nor grandchildren for happiness, or even a good fortune - they have to do it themselves (with a little help in the form of a good education, which I/we did for our lot).
You have done your best and you are gracious about it!
Go well
Taurisk