October 2018. How do I get Consuela to kneel? M'mmmm, tile grout needs cleaning - the two bird stratagem No.14 required. Purchase Kercher Hand steamer and lament the bad knee. Result: Grout cleaned without expensive, noxious chemicals and Consuela on her knees - a splendid job, I must say.
Her reward on completion: Light several scented candles, dim the lights, put on a Barry White record, get nude, anoint oneself with exotic oils, recline in majestic like pose with grapes at the ready and wiggle eyebrows whilst lip-sinking Barry's baritone words of erotic come hither. "Come here, my dear and take off your brazeeer." Or words to that effect.
Well at least I got the grout cleaned .
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October 2018. How do I get Consuela to kneel? M'mmmm, tile grout...
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