these are generalisations.- broadly right but i can provide you with other research that shows that the different hormonal composition of men and women leads to different behaviours. add personality to that and schema /dominant responses and values and it varies more.
crying - frustration i can tell you. when you get someone who wants things their way its tough going. frustration is a shade of anger but it is different and it expresses itself differently
physical aggression - never from me - though on a couple of occasions i went outside and threw something but i knew within a few months that would be foolish
i guess i did feel angry but when it is not safe you internalise it - i got very unwell physically and that resulted in osteoarthritis and barrett's oesophagus the issue is more likely therefore not whether you get angry but how you express it and the level of control you exercise.
i think this stuff is circumstances. if you are in a relationship where one person has an agenda that is not honourable and likes power the normal rules and negotiations go out the door. i came home one day from working in NSW to find a boat. another day - a backhoe turns up. then a loader. we had a large farm trailer made - used maybe three times. I'm not telling you how much i forked out for tractor nd buckets but my guess is i was done for dinner. choice - pay up and harmony or a heap of shit.
the one good thing for me has been hotcopper and time HC because I've been able to see how abusive and rude he is to people if they don't agree. Time because things fade. i clearly have triggers because I've responded to your posts - but even those are fading for me. i don't think you ever completely forget violence but you can become bitter or more determined to be decent. I'm the latter. I actively focus on empathy but i am also learning boundaries. i listen to my inner voice and am getting better at doing that. i have enough good friends to know i am loved by people and so the version of me he was determined to describe was his figment not reality.
i think we could all do better t learning things earlier and recognising what it takes to pay attention. but the mating game when you are younger is a very strange thing.
