how to make money in shares in 2010

I admit at the outset that this is a cynical post. You can choose to ignore it as the outpourings of an angry (young) man. Young being relative to say how long the earth has been in existence.

However, it is based not only on the evidence of the outrageously criminal activities of some companies during 2009 but also on my 20+ years in investing in the Australian bourse.

RULE 1 FOR 2010: Take profit when you can. This may seem fundamental, but many holders during 2009 kept waiting for the next .001 increase. Don't wait. That increase may not come. $200 profit is $200 in your pocket.

RULE 2 FOR 2010: Without an announcement of world-beating significance, a share price will always fall. The drop in hog futures in Texas, decreasing Jap exports of tyres to Tasmania, a slump in dildo production in Brazil. Doesn't matter what the excuse, our scaredy-cat screen jocks will find an excuse to drive a price down. If a company has not issued an announcement within two weeks, sell it. Who cares, it's their problem. Take your .002 spread and move on.

RULE 3 FOR 2010: Don't believe company announcements. They are spin, even as dryly as they are presented. They are dry because in most cases there is nothing to say. Sell on the announcement. Why? See Rule 2.

RULE 4 FOR 2010: Be harsh, cruel, cold, disbelieving. Buy and sell at small upwards or downward increments (stop losses). Forget the future riches promised by prospective oil strikes or gold discoveries. Drive up the volume. Perhaps then companies might start to examine why their share turnover volume has increased dramatically yet the directors aren't getting the sudden SP increases. Tsk, tsk, so they're not making money from the suckers anymore.

RULE 5 FOR 2010: Don't believe anyone on Hot Copper who suggests massive SP increases. They are on the payroll of a company or is such a newbie to this business they should really be directing traffic at an RTA road works.

RULE 6 FOR 2010: Go with your gut. Forget charts and technical analysis. If you feel something is not right, bail out.

RULE 7 FOR 2010: Don't be manipulated. The bourse is in the hands of desert rats with the moral fibre of drug dealers. Watch for unusual course of sales - my favourite is in the same recurring last 3 digits of sales, ie XXX,040, XXX,017. Watch for them. These are thieves who want your money and will prop and cap and smile as they fleece small punters.

RULE 8 FOR 2010: Remember you will not get rich from shares. You might make some fun money at best, unless something really comes home. Then you can boast.

RULE 9 FOR 2010: ASIC, ASX, APRA and every other acronym supposedly monitoring trading is doing exactly the opposite. They don't care about you and me. They are, mostly, government workers who think more about overtime entitlements and long service leave than some aggrieved small trader who calls them about manipulative trading in a small cap gold stock. Your best bet is to ignore them and hope they get sacked for being useless.

AND FINALLY RULE 10 FOR 2010: Do not invest money you can't afford to lose. You will lose it, undoubtedly. How else could the instos survive without taking your money?

This has been a community service from Larrylongboarder, who admits to losing during the back half of 2009 after having had a moderately lucrative career in investing.