It's so hot that...· the birds have to use potholders to pull...

  1. 2,092 Posts.

    It's so hot that...

    · the birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.

    · the potatoes cook underground, and all you have to do to have lunch is to pull one out and add butter, salt and pepper.

    · farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying hard-boiled eggs.

    · the cows are giving evaporated milk.

    · the trees are whistling for the dogs.

    · you eat hot chilies to cool your mouth off.

    · you learn that a seat belt makes a pretty good branding iron.

    · you've experienced condensation on your butt from the hot water in the toilet bowl.

    · you would give anything to be able to splash cold water on your face.

    · you can attend any function wearing shorts and a tank top.

    · The 4 seasons are: tolerable, hot, really hot, and ARE YOU KIDDING ME??!!

    · you discover that it takes only 2 fingers to drive your car.

    · you discover that you can get a sunburn through your car window.

    · you notice the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.

    · hot water now comes out of both taps.

    · kids are on summer vacation, and not one person is out on the streets.

    · you actually burn your hand opening the car door.

    · you break a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m. before work.

    · your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?"

    · you realize that asphalt has a liquid state.
 
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