johnaus - garden variety correction wednesday, page-33

Dear CFD provider,

Thank you for your most excellent follow us service and customer care. Its so nice of you to notice I have not been as active with the "PANIC NOW" button as I have been. This is because I have been busy visiting my doctor. Apparently I have contracted tennis elbow - in both elbows. He also sent me up to the hospital to get my hands xrayed because he suspected I might have some impact stress fractures in my hands somewhere.
Funny thing is, you aren't the first one to mention my lax use of the "PANIC NOW" button. Uncle Fred came to visit me while I was getting my xray and enquired as to how my "PANIC NOW" button was faring. Hes never usually so caring. He even recommended a good bone surgeon who could install some titanium elbows in both arms so I could keep swinging down on the red button.
Anyway - he said he was nearly done with his "BUY EVERYTHING NOW" button and he was keen to give me a go at it but he said he really needed me to keep smashing my "PANIC NOW" button to help speed things up - he even gave me a big fluffy oven mitt or whatever to put on the button to make it easier on my fractured hand.
You know what else he said that made me a little teary - he said words to the effect "You scratch my back and then you can turn around and bend over and I'll respond in kind - you know just like my bumper sticker."
How kind is that! Maybe there is a chance he'll mention me in his will. I don't quite get what he meant about "the bumper sticker" because the only bumper sticker I've seen on his car is the one with the kiwi and the kangaroo - you know the one - where ones dominating the other?
Anyway - I thought I had better let you know that once I've installed Uncles Freds oven mitt on my "PANIC NOW" button I will try my hardest to keep up my end of our partnership - but I'm getting real tired now - theres only so much bad news that one can take before its all BLAH BLAH BLAH.
So rest assured I intend to stick at the red button so that we can bring on the green button quicker.

Lots of Love
Your favourite b class client
a member of H.E.R.D. incorporated.