kids dont make you happy, page-47

I'm not surprised to read that article, but it's worth remembering that statistics don't mean a lot without knowing how the research was performed. What questions were asked, who did they ask (equal male and female), Did they ask the person who spends the most time with them, at what point in time were these questions asked, ages of the children, etc.

Being the main carer for young ones is no easy task, whether there's a partner or not. I've been told by friends who are working mothers that they relished that diversion in their lives. I was a stay at home mum with 3 children and it was bloody hard work, even with a support network. Show me anyone who likes doing the same, often mundane, tasks day in, day out with no workmates to relieve the monotony. The stay at home parent is expected to run a tight ship. And of course, single parents do it extra tough.

Many things will affect the happiness of the parent at any given time. After the initial new baby euphoria and the innocent years, the reward in bringing up children eventually comes in proportion to the effort made to help our children become comfortable members of society. And these efforts should be unconditional. And there's the rub.

I suspect that the baby bonus hasn't done much to alter the feelings echoed in that article. Parenthood is a long term commitment, for which I fear many are not prepared.

Eventually, as the children grow up we can hope to gain fulfillment at having raised them, but in the meantime, it's more important that the children are the happy ones.