Lawyers Weekly, page-111

Can You Beat This Logic?

A man and his wife were getting a divorce at a local court. But the custody of their children posed a problem.

The mother jumped to her feet and protested to the judge that since she had brought the Children into this world, she should retain Custody of them.

The man also wanted custody of his children. The judge asked for his side of the story too.

After a long moment of silence, the man rose from the chair and replied:........

"Judge, when I put a dollar into a vending machine, and a Pepsi comes out, does the Pepsi belong to me or to the machine?"

Don't laugh, but the man won.

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The lawyer is standing at the gate to Heaven and St. Peter is listing his sins:

1) Defending a large corporation in a pollution suit where he knew
they were guilty.
2) Defending an obviously guilty murderer because the fee was high.
3) Overcharging fees to many clients.
4) Prosecuting an innocent woman because a scapegoat was needed in a controversial case. And the list goes on for quite awhile.

The lawyer objects and begins to argue his case. He admits all these things, but argues, "Wait, I've done some charity in my life also. "St. Peter looks in his book and says, "Yes, I see. Once you gave a dime to a panhandler and once you gave an extra nickel to the shoeshine boy, correct?"

The lawyer gets a smug look on his face and replies, "Yes."

St. Peter turns to the angel next to him and says, "Give this guy 15 cents
and tell him to go to hell."