This is Mr Lincoln Augustus, first second cousin of...

This is Mr Lincoln Augustus, first second cousin of Holymagiman.

My dear Mr Hardmano, as you will not be in Austria then, the family hopes that you are leaving Austria to come to Jamaica in the end of January 2010 to attend the Air Jamaica Jazz and Blues Festival.

Of course you will be staying at the Ritz-Carlton Golf and Spa Resort,as befits a man of your standing, and we could perhaps catch up for a couple of Red Stripes and dinner then, at the Raggae Jerk Centre, or maybe in the Cohoba Lounge, if that suits you better.

There will be so much to talk about, and we all look forward to being beneficiaries of your imparted wisdom and charm. And Holymagiman will benefit from being able to speak the Queen's English with a real Englishman.

The beers will, of course, be on us,as will be the dinner and anything else, and we will impress upon Kitty Mah'hboob who serves at the bar to make sure that you end up with nothing left out in a pleasurable evening (or two?)

Blessing of the Lord till we meet.

MLA