With the return of Martis yesterday, Toastie reminded me of dgoransson's "Latin Versions" of the DJIA.
Good time to relive another one I reckon.
It is a bit long, so I'll keep the rest brief.
enjoy.....
DJIA Latin Version
The Bulls of the Roman legions, having gained a glorious victory the day before, defending their territory desperately in a battle we now call “The Shakeout,” did pursue Martis the Bear and Caylus the Short and their barbarian horde.
And many in the Barbarian camp did run with buttocks bared for the gods, having been pleased with the blood letting of the Roman General they called “The Goblin,” did command the spirits of the smart money that they should squeeze the shorts of the bears and burn them for a time.
And so the Barbarian Horde was chased all the way to the 10940 and the Romans did threaten to take the 11000 that Martis the Bear holds so sacred.
We shall digress now a little into the past to tell of how Caylus the Short did throw in his lot with Martis the Bear and did make a sacrifice of a 7% stop loss that the Smart Money might stop their incessant harassment of his trading.
Enter Caylus The Short
Caylus was called "The Short," not because he was small of stature, for he was a large man and well endowed with Kahoonas that would make any Bear envious. Nay, he was called The Short simply because he loved to short. And he would raid the territory of the SPX and the CAC and even the DAX which did make widows of many a warriors woman, and he would cut down any dead cat that bounced and so he multiplied the scalps which he did weave into his leathers.
But the spirits of the Smart Money were not pleased that Caylus should loot the bodies they left behind in their wake for they are jealous of the plunder and would share none of it with any mere mortal. So when the world did crash on the dawn of August and the markets staggered like a drunkard moving to and fro, the spirits of the Smart Money did turn on Caylus the short and did hunt his stops aggressively and caused him so much grief that he was dismayed.
But when Martis the Bear did rise up and pronounce his prophecy of the C wave, Caylus the Short was seduced by the squiggly runes that spiral down by which Martis does make his magic, and though having no love for the Barbarian, he did envy the loot that the C wave might render and was not content that Martis the Bear should have it all.
And so Caylus and Martis did spit upon their hands and did place them on each others balls and did swear an alliance and did bind it with a curse (for they trusted each other not) that if either of the two should break the alliance before the C Wave be completed then the Gods should give the power to the offended party to see the oath breakers manhood rotted away.
Now Caylus the Short was not a fool, and though he did believe in Martis’s C wave he did fear the spirits of the smart money and knew they would hunt his stops as before and the wave might swing and pivot to and fro a few times before the Cwave be completed, so he sought out a druid.
“You have it with you?”
“I have brought it,” Caylus replied, keeping a wary eye on the aged man who wore a dirty druids garb, for he looked as if he should be in his grave, and he did not trust the smell of potions in the hovel that the druid did make his magic.
“And what offering have you decided to make to the Smart Money,” the old man asked a little too eagerly.
“ I have brought a stop loss of 7 percent,” Caylus replied. “Is it enough do you think?”
“7 percent!” the old druid wheezed as he sucked in a sharp breath and his eyes flew wide and his tongue darted greedily about his lips. “Yes,” he said nodding enthusiastically. “Show me.”
Caylus withdrew the bag of gold from his tunic and the old druid with shaking hands reached instinctively for it.
“Wait!” Caylus pulled the bag back and the druid clutched clumsily at empty air before finally composing himself and giving Caylus an evil eye.
“This will guarantee me protection from the stop hunting of the Smart Money, will it not?” caylus asked suspiciously.
Sighing deeply, the druid finally lifted his eyes from the bag of gold and replied. “No amount of gold or magic will guarantee that the spirits of the smart money won’t rob you of your stops.”
“Then what am I paying you for!” Caylus raised his voice angrily
“Uh,Uh, You know the greed of the Smart Money as well as anyone,” the druid wagged his finger as he lectured. “The best we can hope for is that when the Smart Money come hunting for the 5% or 6% stop loss and even the 6.9% then PERHAPS, they may leave your 7% alone before they go on their way.”
Caylus grunted his dissatisfaction but he knew it was true.
“But perhaps,” the druid smiled conspiratorially as he rubbed his fingers together, “we could raise the stop loss to 8 or 9 or even 10%”
“NO!” Caylus again eyed the old man suspiciously, “7 percent will have to suffice.”
“Oh well,” the druid said disappointedly, “I did try.”
Caylus moved his hand as if to pass the gold to the old man before again pulling it back leaving the druid once more clutching greedily at thin air.
“Martis is right about the C wave, is he not?” The warlord asked.
“If you believe in his magic,” The druid replied noncommittally, “and the gods do love him. There’s that.”
“What do you mean?” Caylus frowned.
“Let me tell you something about Martis,” The druid sighed deeply as if he were suffering a great deal of patience. “Martis was born out of the arse of the Bear. He can only see with one eye and that be down the brown eye of the bear and in one direction only he looks and that is south. Even if the Bear had been standing on its head when it bore him, Martis would have been born breach. And that is why the gods love him.”
“Because he was born of a Bear?” Caylus scratched his head.
“No No No! Because he is INSANE!” and with that the old man cackled before continuing. “Did you know that Martis believes the Bear will one day trample the 3000 of the DOW?”
“You are talking of Ragnarok!” Caylus whispered in awe. “Is such a thing possible?”
“Possible,” the druid nodded, “but not probable.”
“Why not.”
“Because, my lord, “ the old man raised a finger, “if the Bear should trample the 3000 and usher in Ragnarok, who would there be left to rule? All the Bulls would be dead and who would be left to fight any battles? How boring would that be? Why would the gods find that amusing? Nay, they wish to be entertained with violence and chaos and blood.” The druid shook his head matter of factly. “It will never happen. The gods won’t allow it. ”
“But the C wave they will allow?” Caylus pressed.
“Well . . .” the druid answered slyly, “if it makes you feel any better, the monk believes in Martis’ C wave.”
“What Monk?”
“You know, the funky one.”
“Ahh, the Funky monk,” Caylus nodded, “is he also for the Bear?”
“Nay,” the druid shook his head, “He is for the Bull. But he respects the bear when he sees it and does sit in cash and stands aside till the C wave should pass. And he does spread out the charts and watches the volume and the spread of the bar and the close and the line of the trend to see when the bull might rise in power again, whereby he does intend to back his chariot up and pile it full of gold.”
“But the C wave he believes will come first?” Caylus asked.
“Yes.”
And so satisfied Caylus did pass the bag of the 7 percent stop loss to the druid, who did pull on it once, twice and then a third time with all his might, before Caylus did release it for the greedy old fool did disgust him.
And so did Caylus the Short go out and join forces with Martis the Bear an put his faith completely in the C Wave.
dgoransson 06 Oct 2011
Good Morning and Welcome to the XJO Tuesday Thread
New for Today (AEDST)
The XJO yesterday broke below the previous pivot low, with a wide spread (showing ease of movement), & with volume just a smidge below average.
(20min delay)