NEWSPAPER HEADLINES FROM THE YEAR 2035
Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Little India, formerly known as Australia.
Tasmania executes last remaining Greenie.
White minorities still trying to have English recognised as Australia's third language.
Children from 2 parent heterosexual families bullied in schools for being 'different'.
(Tolerance urged.)
Gay Marriages now overtake heterosexual marriages as preferred 'lifestyle' choice
Japan announces that they will no longer consume whale meat as whales are now extinct and the scientific research fleet are unemployed. Australian Government have told the Japanese that cane toads taste very similar to whale meat.
Australia now has 10 Universities of Political Correctness. Professor Goldman of ANU says there is still a long way to go in the fight to stop people saying what they think.
Australian Deficit $10 trillion dollars and rising. Government declares return to surplus in 100 years which is 300 years ahead of time. Prime Minister Mohammed Youssef claims increased growth through more immigration secret to success.
Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped.
Melbourne schoolgirl expelled for not wearing burqa: Being a Christian is no excuse says school. Sharia law must be enforced.
Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
Castro finally dies at age 130. Cuban cigars can now be imported legally into the USA, but US President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
Jose Manuel Rodriguez Bush says he will run for second term as Cuban President in 2032.
Australia Post raises price of stamps to $22 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
After a 10-year, $75.8 billion study: Scientists prove diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.
Average weight of an Australian drops to 115 kgs.
Global cooling blamed for citrus crop failure for third consecutive year
Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.
Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights. Victims to be held partly responsible for crime.
Average height of professional basketball players is now nine feet, seven inches.
New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2035 as lethal weapons.
Australian Tax Office sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.
