Postaone I've attended the Big House today, along with the other...

Postaone

I've attended the Big House today, along with the other 10 million God botherers, which is quite remarkable considering there is only 10 million and 5 of them in this new country that I've adopted as my favourite place of worship. (Compared to downunder where < 5% practice JC's recommendation).

Since I don't speak the local chant, I reverted to speaking in my regular tongue: "Dearest Lord, you know I live in this wretched place only because of your sustaining House, and the unfortunate fact that it is all I can afford since my reliance on the devilish ASX for my daily bread. But if you were to ensure that Dorado and Phoenix were immeasurably full of oil beyond our wildest prayers, then I may be able to return to downunder. If so, I promise I won't touch a drop of beer or swear like those other heathens, and I'll do my best to drag them from their football into your better game, to cheer and shout all your winnings. Also, regarding Buffalo, I humbly ask that you don't allow too much to be shared with your other botherers to the north, who even though they could do with the wealth, it would only turn them into modernists unworthy of their Faith. Best to leave them in their poverty to remember your good self, and allow us Australians to take the better share, after all, we are all mostly lost and unrecoverable."

Now, please excuse me for the remainder of the day as I have an extended family lunch to attend, typical of the norms here, as well as becoming respectfully intoxicated. Amen :).

PS: thanks be to God for all the great posters above. You know who you are even if you don't need me (or God) to tell you.