we need a new report post category on HC -- virusism

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pintohoo

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19/09/20

20:23

Post #: 47476829
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Originally posted by mogga ↑

Some say the virus doesn't discriminate.

But, it must discriminate, because:
1. It is ageist (average age of death and ICU admittance - 83);
2. It is ableist (it strikes those with pre-existing morbidities);
3. It hides in the sunlight and only comes out at night (after 8);
4. It prefers overweight, unhealthy people to healthy ones;
5. It kills small business customers but not Woolworths and Coles shoppers;
6. It doesn't spread from police beating people, but might kill you or your parents if you give them a hug;
7. It spreads at polling booths, but not Centrelink queues;
8. It emerges when governments offer cash rewards for positive cases;
9. It obeys the commands of the Chief Medical Officer;
10. It spreads in parks and on beaches, but doesn't spread in bottle shops;
11. There are no reported instances of it being passed from a student to a teacher, worldwide;
12. It spreads amongst lockdown protestors but not BLM protestors (because, apparently, it has a social conscience);
13. It will be spread by four children trying to see their dying father, but not Tom Hanks or the AFL;
14. It is spread by families interacting but not by horny guards in hotel quarantine;
15. It is spread while camping by yourself in the middle of the wilderness, but not in government building gyms.
16. It will spread in swimming pools, but only if they are public pools;
17. If you wear a mask, any virus you might be carrying will cower inside your mouth and won't be released, but if you don't wear a mask, the virus will just leap out of your mouth and into the mouth of the nearest person.
18. It doesn't affect family reunions if you are Afghani

For an unliving protein strand, the virus is one discriminatory bastard.

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we need a new report post category on HC --

virusism
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