“Who Signed Off On That Deal?”
By The Red Flag Review Committee
[Verse 1 – groovy but suspicious]
It started with a handshake,
A LinkedIn post, a smile fake.
They said “synergy,” “strategic fit,”
But even the interns said, “this deal’s… a bit suss, innit?”
No revenue, no scale, no clue,
And somehow… we’re stuck with it too?
[Pre-Chorus – tense and building]
NDA, LOI, smoke and mirrors in the sky…
We got questions.
And we want names.
[Chorus – accusatory and fierce]
Who signed off on that deal?
Was it done on the golf course? Was it even real?
Was there due diligence, or just a wheel spin?
Now the shareholders lose while the execs grin.
Who signed off on that deal?!
We want answers — not a marketing spiel.
[Verse 2 – dark, sarcastic tone]
Oh, “game-changing tech” they said,
Now it's buried under months of red.
Press release dropped, share price rose,
Then reality hit — and everyone froze.
Was it Adrian? The Chair? Legal team asleep?
Someone signed this mess — and the damage runs deep.
[Bridge – quiet, then exploding]
Let’s rewind the minutes, pull the boardroom tapes,
Trace every “aye” that sealed our fates.
Someone clicked “approve” on that mirage…
Now the cap table's wreckage is your collage.
[Explosion into final chorus]
[Final Chorus – chant it loud]
Who signed off on that deal?!
Come out from the shadows, let’s make this real.
We don’t want fluff, we don’t want spin —
We want the name of the one who let it in!
Who signed off on that deal?!
This ain’t monopoly — it’s real capital, feel?
[Outro – echoing like a courtroom]
"Was there a vote?"
"Did anyone read the contract?"
"Was it… Jarvis?"
... oh right — he’s gone too.
Warmest regards,
PD
(20min delay)