THIS is a long story...but dear reader, it is WORTH reading!Love...

THIS is a long story...but dear reader, it is WORTH reading!

Love them or hate them....mainstream banks don't chisel you on your deposits.

You see when you take your 21 cents of hard earned money to them to look after...they record your deposit as 21 cents and they also then pay you a brilliant thing called INTEREST! (Remember the good old days when we used to get it credited and added to our little bank deposit book?)


But over in WA, some super-sharpies came up with a brilliant idea called "looking for investments" and decided to form a bank.

These fun-loving gad-abouts decided to start the Bank of Batavia...or BTV as it quickly became known.

Now, when little Johnnie or Bernie the retiree or Wally the somewhat naive sharemarket investor who thinks the sharemarket is squeaky clean (poor schmuck!)...takes his hard earned, sweat of the brow "value of money" into the swanky Bank of BTV, here's what they do.

Firstly...Ologist is there is give you a big cheesy WELCOME & a flashy "TRUST ME" smile...'cos that's the fun, upfront, totally transparent kind of guy he is.

Ologist politely points you to the counter where you proudly put your 21 cents of ACTUAL VALUE on the table.

Kaaachingggg! Kaaachinnnggg! Goes the BTV computer system and in a nano second your deposit of value is instantly transformed from 21 cents to 8 cents!

"Hellooow, What's happened here?" you ask,only to be told about one of the "mysteries of mining".

So mysterious that most people only hush and nod when it is raised. It's a touchy subject, sacrosanct ground known fully to only a few...one of whom is the SMILER! AND the SMILER is standing right behind you!

Yep...the smiling Ologist...is the SMILER!!! Keeper and defender of the MYSTERY!

But, I'm here today to open up the mystery, so stay with me.

You see, the BTV Bank stamped your passbook with just 8 cents even though you know you have/gave them 21 cents.

What's more they also stamped it "No Interest Paid" and "Don't ask for a withdrawal greater than the 8 cents, otherwise you'll have to deal with the SMILER"

Now, very few peple know about the SMILER'S history...in his professional wrestling days, he was known as "Haystacks Calhuon" a man of considerable bluster and force.

Not deterred, even as you look nervously over your shoulder at the Ologist, the SMILER aka Haystacks Calhuon...who is smiling beningly, you ask "where has the 13 cents gone? I genuinely own 21 cents, gave it to you and you've only credited me for 8 cents."

"The Black Hole"...yells the SMILER as he opens the door for another sucker (sorry, investor) to enter.

"What's the black hole?" you ask, followed by "will I get my money back if I want it?"

"The Black Hole is officially known as our "Funds Pending Investment"...though we haven't done much of this lately and NO, you cannot get your money back" says the SMILER in his deep Haystacks Calhuon voice.

"Wow", you think, "I'm stuffed."

But then you remember, when you make a deposit at the BTV Bank, you also become a shareholder, an owner!!!


"Joy of joys...I'm an owner, now I can tell the Ologist (who is the SMILER aka Haystacks Calhuon, the wrestling brawler) what I want because HE WORKS FOR ME."

The Ologist is perceptive (not sure about perceptive in finding "investments" but perceptive in protecting his job at the BTV Bank)...he "feels" the vibe.

"Don't even think about it sonny...we make the rules here at the Bank....you guys are just amateurs...you've got no chance of getting your money out of the Black Hole until we say so and we ain't saying so. We've got too much firepower for you pratts!"

So...forlornly you depart the bank, together with the wind from the door been slammed real hard, real fast on your back. The laughter of the Ologist is your last recollection of the BTV Bank.

You feel inadequate, just like the 97 pound weakling from the muscle building advertisements form years ago.

Meanwhile...up at the internet cafe...a group of disaffected BTV depositers are having a meeting...

Story to be continued.

Final Comment:
Of course this story isn't true.....but the underlying message is!

If you are a BTV shareholder and want to be inside that cosy internet cafe where we are thinking about our options on what to do to unlock our 21 cents of value into CASH, email me [email protected]