the concession speech

My fellow aUSTRALIANS ,sob sob sob sob it gives me no pleasure to congratulate that dreadful man on his victory so I wont ,I just want to thank me for a wonderful fight you awful people that voted for the Libs well buggar you and for those wonderful folks who voted for me well buggar you too you should have convinced all your friends to vote for me and you obviously didn't.
AS for my staff well buggar them too they obviously did a bad job or I would have won.
As for my fellow Labor MPs well buggar them too they should have worked harder.
So the only person who is worthy of praise is me for carrying the can for all you useless twits .

Gotta zip.