You know once you have become the central pun in political...

  1. 9,438 Posts.
    You know once you have become the central pun in political satire that your place in history is assured. Short of curing cancer, there is nothing Thomson can do now to erase the collective memory of Australians.

    I can just imagine Sydney and Melbourne Brothels offering the "Craig Thomson - Anything Goes" Package now... opportunism at its best.


    Agog at latest card-carrying contortions

    Mike Carlton

    Dear Reader,

    Success brings its own rewards. Here at the Mike Carlton column, we understand that your success demands a level of service and luxury beyond normal expectations.

    Today, that moment has arrived. We are delighted to offer you membership in the exclusive Craig Thomson(R) Platinum Credit Card Rewards Program. Your expectations met and exceeded. Every time.

    Advertisement: Story continues below

    The Craig Thomson(R) Platinum Card opens the door to one-of-a-kind privileges and services that will enhance your high-end lifestyle. The finest hotels and restaurants. Four-star travel. World-class entertainment with a uniquely personal touch.

    For example, you're on business in an unfamiliar city. After a tough day of decision-making, you need to relax. Unwind.

    The Craig Thomson(R) Platinum Card can arrange that for you. Perhaps it's a happy ending from the fluttering fingers of a skilled Thai masseuse. Or the complete en-suite hotel package of a candlelight gourmet dinner and the intimate attention of a delightful escort of your choice. It's all within reach.

    But it doesn't stop there. Let's say you need to fund your election campaign for a swinging seat in the Australian parliament. Again, the Craig Thomson(R) Platinum Card is at your service. The money you need is just a signature away.

    And best of all, you pay no extra. Your monthly Craig Thomson(R) Platinum Card account is discreetly sent to the employer of your choice, be it a multinational corporation, national trade union or political party. It's as easy as that. No difficult questions from your spouse or partner.

    Of course, security and discretion are paramount. Should your card be lost or stolen or used inappropriately by someone else, there are no questions asked.

    It's time to seize the moment. We invite you to apply today to join the select few for whom the Craig Thomson(R) Platinum Credit Card Rewards Program provides unique pleasure and opportunity. A new way of looking at your world.


    Read more: http://www.smh.com.au/opinion/society-and-culture/agog-at-latest-cardcarrying-contortions-20110826-1je2t.html#ixzz1WHnAIRCz
 
arrow-down-2 Created with Sketch. arrow-down-2 Created with Sketch.