"Certified, I know plenty of Muslims and none of them give a hoot that I don't believe in God,"
Beach Dingo you are mistaken.
1. Either they are not true muslims or
2. They are true muslims and they do give a "hoot" because as a non believer they would consider you don't have a soul and are therefore not even classed as human or
3. You have no idea about islam.
