Police have declared the incident with Tony Abbott in Hobart as being a false fag attack. New evidence from eye witnesses has been found that states that the man in the T shirt was seen rapidly approaching Mr. Abbott asking ‘comeon Tony, give’us a kiss’. Mr Abbott apparently was caught off guard and was indeed in the act of puckering up in order to happily comply with the request and, as not uncommon in the rushed loving kissing physicality arena, particularly in Hobart – Mr Abbotts lips and the mans head had a momentary loving collision. No ex politian’s or animals were harmed in the incident, Police said.
Credence has been also given to this new evidence as the Ex Prime Ministers wife Margaret has been seen studying the redbook second hand prices on old Merc’s and visiting surf shops to get valuations on used surf boards in case there is a marital blow up over the matter. Privately, she has stated that ‘I always knew there was something different’. Discussions with divorce lawyers seem to have bogged down though on whether or not Mr. Abbotts used famous bungie smugglers would be seen as just mere personal possessions worth nothing or if framed as sets, they could command a fortune at places like Sotheby’s. Journalists are monitoring the situation closely.
