When you do find him hope he has a girlfriend. Send hookers and...

When you do find him hope he has a girlfriend. Send hookers and pizza to his place at all odd hours of the day. Send love letters to his address. Maybe send the TRG to his place, report suspicious activity, use your imagination but don't go overboard. Letter drop the neighbours that he's a dishonest person so nobody will look him in the eye. All that sort of nice stuff to make yourself feel better.

PS: Don't forget to turn your caller id off!