upset wife

She came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making

love to a very attractive young woman.

The wife was VERY upset!

"You are a disrespectful pig!" she cried. "How dare you do this to

me a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce straight away!"

And he replied: "Hang on just a minute luv, so at least I can tell you what happened.

"Fine, go ahead", she sobbed, "but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!"

And he began: "Well, I was getting into the car to drive home and this young Lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenceless that I took pity on her and let her into the car.

I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty.

She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days! So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight.

The poor thing devoured them in moments.

Since she needed a good clean-up I suggested a shower and while she was doing that I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so I threw them away. Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don't wear because you say they are too tight. I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don't wear because I don't have good taste.

I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't wear just to annoy her and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and don't wear because someone at work has a pair like them.."

He took a quick breath and continued: "She was so grateful for my understanding and help and as I walked her to the door she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said "Please........do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?'"