WHY I FIRED MY SECRETARY > >Two weeks ago was my 44th birthday and I wasn't feeling too hot that > >morning. I went down to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and >say > >"Happy Birthday" and probably have a present for me. > >She didn't even say "Good Morning," let alone any "Happy Birthday." I > >thought, "Well, that's wives for you. The children will remember." > >The children came down to breakfast and didn't say a word. > >When I started to the office I was feeling pretty low and despondent. > >As I walked into my office, my secretary, Janet said, > >"Good Morning, Boss, Happy Birthday." I felt a little better. Someone >had > >remembered. > >I worked until noon, then Janet knocked on my door and said, "You know it > >is > >such a beautiful day outside and it is your birthday, let's go to lunch, > >just you and me." I said, "By George, that's the greatest thing I've >heard > >all day. Let's go." > >We went to lunch. We didn't go where we normally go. We went out into the > >country to a little private place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch > >tremendously. > >On the way back to the office, she said, "You know, it is such a >beautiful > >day, we don't need to go back to the office, do we?" > >I said, "No, I guess not." She said, "Let's go to my apartment." > >After arriving at her apartment she said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I >think > >I'll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable.: > >"Sure," I excitedly replied. > >She went into the bedroom and, in about six minutes she came out carrying >a > >big birthday cake, followed by my wife, children and dozens of our >friends. > >They were all singing Happy Birthday...........and there I sat on the > >couch.........F*CK*NG NAKED