Hi P-Cat. There's truth in some of your comments such as what...

Hi P-Cat. There's truth in some of your comments such as what men want. But I believe that, with women, a relationship 'qualification period' never stops, even after marriage. There are a lot of women that constantly test their partners for validation of their man's love and devotion. The obvious things such as remembering an anniversary, a birthday, etc, and having the man symbolise the 'occasion' with a token, such as a card, flowers, dinner, jewellery and a holiday. The more expensive the token the bigger the validation of the man's commitment is quantified in the relationship. True, many women aren't like that, and I'm sure you are not like that at all (treading safe water here, so please humour me). But the confusion with a lot of women is that they associate the level of the man's tokens or gifts with the level of what is spent. Not good when you have kids involved - not good when you're trying your darnedest to keep a roof over your head and pay the bills. Is it any wonder, as someone mentioned on this thread, that women instigate the majority of divorces with money being the NUMBER ONE factor.

Imagine the frustration of a guy who finds himself in a situation where he is at a financial wall, where he virtually has nothing 'more' to give to validate the relationship. If he maxes out on his credit card to pay for the Bali holiday then what happens when the money needs to be paid back, what will be sacrificed to do exactly that. And what will the woman want for the next validation - will she accept less? Will she accept not having her holiday when 'all' her friends are travelling overseas when she is not? Not fair, and that is when she must dump her man, no matter how many kids they have, because it's better for the women to 'feel loved' with a shower of tokens than to put her wants aside. Too bad for the 'richer or poorer' wedding vows that are said. Why do people say such things when they don't 100% mean it. Are they living for the moment knowing full well that they will only remain committed if the marriage remains in constant 'honey moon mode'?

From a man's perspective, the majority feel that once in a relationship that the qualification period is over, that there is no more need to prove of what they are capable of doing. They believe that simply coming home at the end of each day and being a part of the the family is more than enough to keep the relationship validated. They have a task to do - go to work to obtain money, and with that money protection and security is 'assured'. That is what they strive for and that is what consumes them. For them that is really all they need to do. So if a man forgets a birthday or an anniversary then is it really necessary to humiliate him by announcing to the world of his dastardly act? Is it really such a bad thing, and does it deserve a confrontation that may last days or weeks, especially when kids are involved?

We, today, overlook the little things that our loved ones do for us, like cooking a meal, holding your hand, a quick cuddle or even a tap on the backside during a fun moment. A good relationship should be built on those little things, and with it trust. From there, you can literally conquer any obstacle that is thrown at you.